Whether you’re an Instameet regular or you’re simply confused about the whole concept, nae stress. I’ve put together a handy, tongue-in-cheek guide to the strange moments that can occur when social media becomes reality. I may be a gramming obsessive, but that doesn’t mean I can’t poke fun at the weird online world we live in. Happy snapping!
Grammers exchanging gram handles
This is the first thing you’ll do on arrival. Say hi, introduce yourself, ask what each others’ handles are, and get stalking. You might either love/hate their photos, be shocked at how many/little followers they have, or go into fangirl mode once you realise that’s the person who’s photography you’ve been loving for so long.
Grammers gramming everything
This may be an obvious one, but really: everything is photographed. From the mode of transport to lunch, it’s all fair game. But more than that, you should be prepared to do some really bizarre things for your new photographer friends. Strut down a castle’s driveway, hold props for their shots, strike your best pose on a hilltop… Yep, it’s ‘all for the gram’.
Grammers acing that ‘tiny people in big places’ shot
If you’re a seasoned Instagrammer, you’ll know that one of the crucial elements to include in your squares is tiny people. Whether they’re far away on a hill, walking down a street or standing on top of a building, no matter: if they’re there, you can use the #tinypeopleinbigplaces hashtag. See the photos for how to ace it.
Grammers one-upping their wanderlust
It’s pretty unavoidable on an Instameet, but perhaps even worse in a country as small as Scotland: everyone thinks they know it better. Cue conversations like, ‘have you ever visited there? Oh my god, it’s just amazing!’ Don’t even bother trying to trump it: just accept that, in this community of wanderlusters and grammers, there’s always someone who’s been someplace more spectacular than you (that doesn’t mean you shouldn’t take a notepad to jot down ideas for your bucket list).
Got your business card at the ready? What, you don’t even have a business card?! (Can we be friends? Neither do I). If you’re out on the Instameet corporate circuit, you’ll find there’s a bunch of folk hunting for new opportunities before this one’s even over. Not that I’m dissing business cards — my love for stationery knows no bounds — but personally, blogging’s for fun. I leave my suit and tie in the wardrobe to fester on a Friday night.